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Old 06-16-2009, 11:24 AM   #131
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Shit, I don't unload the entire wagon when I first meet a girl. There is all kinds of shit that a woman will never know about me unless she asks! For example, my current gf had no idea I was part black until she asked and that was after I had "been" with her a few times. Listen, all joking aside, I understand that you should discuss new decisions with your partner but all you guys claiming that you tell your "partners" everything are full of crap!
Why? Because we dont operate like you do?

Just because you dont tell your partner anything unless she asks, doesnt mean everyone acts like that in a "relationship".
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Old 06-16-2009, 11:25 AM   #132
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Two more male voices of reason.

Triple, I dont know how old you are, I dont knw if you truly want a divorce or not, but maybe the advice of a few guys who seem to have their heads on straight versus a few "emotional" women will hold more weight. Good luck man.
Rae, why is it that everyone that agrees with you is "a voice of reason"? I'd imagine that you discussed getting breast implants with your man before you did it. What if he would have said no? What then? Okay, I totally agree with you that he should discuss this with his wife. Fine. She's obviously going to say "no way". What then? Like I said before, this is a no win situation for Triple period. The end result is going to be divorce, of that I have zero doubt. He should do everything in his power to ensure that there won't be any children involved. If he doesn't get fixed while they're together, he had better make an appointment 5 minutes after they split up!
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Old 06-16-2009, 11:27 AM   #133
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This shouldn't even be a discussion. Triple, amigo, its time to call a lawyer.
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Old 06-16-2009, 11:29 AM   #134
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Rae, why is it that everyone that agrees with you is "a voice of reason"? I'd imagine that you discussed getting breast implants with your man before you did it. What if he would have said no? What then? Okay, I totally agree with you that he should discuss this with his wife. Fine. She's obviously going to say "no way". What then? Like I said before, this is a no win situation for Triple period. The end result is going to be divorce, of that I have zero doubt. He should do everything in his power to ensure that there won't be any children involved. If he doesn't get fixed while they're together, he had better make an appointment 5 minutes after they split up!
Perhaps its because I use logic, rationality, and morality in my arguments, versus telling someone its ok to lie to someone who chose to love, cherish, and honor, etc for marriage vows.

I dont use my past bad experience "in the hood" to tell people that because I get myself involved with lying cheating women that try to "trap" me into things, that all women are like that and its a good idea to lie to someone in a manner that could ruin her life versus just telling her like a man and her dealing or divorcing.

NAhhhhh....that couldnt be it.
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Old 06-16-2009, 11:36 AM   #135
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Shit, I don't unload the entire wagon when I first meet a girl. There is all kinds of shit that a woman will never know about me unless she asks! For example, my current gf had no idea I was part black until she asked and that was after I had "been" with her a few times. Listen, all joking aside, I understand that you should discuss new decisions with your partner but all you guys claiming that you tell your "partners" everything are full of crap!
Never said I'd tell her "everything"...........For example, who gives a shit that you're part-Black? Who gives a shit that my mother's side is Scottish from like 250-300 years ago? That type of info is not important to a relationship. Holding back the fact that you eliminated your ability to reproduce is.
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Old 06-16-2009, 11:39 AM   #136
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I guess the course of action every one can agree on us divorce.


Didn't we have a thread like this a little while ago?

And weren't the people who were giving the "best" advice either divorced multiple times, married or engaged after knowing the so for about a year?


Do what you want triple. If you told her you didn't want kids. She is the one to deal with that. Not you. It may not be completely honest, but at least when she forgets her pill on purpose, you'll be covered.
Exactly! It's always the marriage failures that know the most about marriage. Hell my marriage crashed but it was great until I left for over a year!!! Oh well... I sometimes think that women have had control over the baby making process for so long they are loathe to give it up. I just hope that they hurry up with this male birth control shot!!!
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Old 06-16-2009, 11:40 AM   #137
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When she and I started dating, I made it clear that I a) had no intention of ever getting married and b) did not want children. She broke me down on the first one, but I can't cave on kids. There was no lifestyle change between living together and being married. Having kids would fuck up everything, however. And things are pretty fucked up to begin with, so no thanks.

She's talking about kids more and more frequently these days; it may soon be time for drastic action. Time to cut the cord(s), so to speak.
Wow, you ARE numb, as your little quote above your avatar suggests.
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Old 06-16-2009, 11:41 AM   #138
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Why? Because we dont operate like you do?

Just because you dont tell your partner anything unless she asks, doesnt mean everyone acts like that in a "relationship".
I'm glad most people don't. I was totally honest with Hannah about everything right up front. I pretty much told her everything that would typically deter someone with being with me, such as previous drug experimentation, being in jail, sexual history, etc.

A year and a half later, we are happy, in love, and engaged.

CHEW ON THAT!
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Old 06-16-2009, 11:42 AM   #139
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This shouldn't even be a discussion. Triple, amigo, its time to call a lawyer.
You're right about that! Personally, I think that the idea of marriage is about dead. I really, really don't see the point in getting married if you aren't going to have children...
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Old 06-16-2009, 11:44 AM   #140
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Perhaps its because I use logic, rationality, and morality in my arguments, versus telling someone its ok to lie to someone who chose to love, cherish, and honor, etc for marriage vows.

I dont use my past bad experience "in the hood" to tell people that because I get myself involved with lying cheating women that try to "trap" me into things, that all women are like that and its a good idea to lie to someone in a manner that could ruin her life versus just telling her like a man and her dealing or divorcing.

NAhhhhh....that couldnt be it.

you dont seem to be able to get through your skull that he's been telling ehr since he met that he didnt want kids. That said, she really should have no say in the matter, as she knew long before marriage entered the picture.

Its not just him who chose to 'love, cherish, and honor', as far as im concerneed, he kept that promise better than she did.

Sure, we know Triple is gonna end up divorced, kids or not, because we'v e known Triple for years, he's selfish and a little ignorant.

But in this case he's right, it requires no 'mutual decision'. I think he should do it, then tell her immediately after that he did it, and let her decide what to do. Because like most women, when she finds out ahead of time that she cant win, she'll 'engineer' a pregnancy... Then triples stuck with a kid he doesnt want cuz she poked a hole in a condom or 'forgot' to take her pills.

Ive actually seen it happen to my uncle, thankfully it turned out ok for him, but im sure TMall remembers when he told us she was pregnant, the relationship was on the rocks and she stopped taking BC behind his back because she 'couldn't afford it'.... Yet she could somehow afford the child that came 9 months later.

Maybe some of us dont trust women because we've realized its not in our best interests, and not all, but most, are controlling beyond belief and willing to destroy a mans life to get what they want.

Ive met a few that werent like this. But its a small few, and their far between.
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